The Truth (about yourself) Will Set You Free

It's an interesting thing, but there seems to be a glaring disparity for many people between how we think about ourselves, and how others perceive us and our abilities. 

Narcissists aside, I think most people have very little self-belief 

Even in areas where it's obvious to everyone around them that they are very gifted. In areas like personality traits, relationships and creative/work endeavours we seem to give ourselves too little credit for who we are and what we can do.

On the face of it this seems like a good thing - humility is a highly desirable trait and sorely lacking in society today. The thing is, self-deprecation is not humility. When we constantly devalue our own gifts, abilities and character we only dig ourselves deeper into a hole of poor self-worth which doesn't help anyone.

I have a friend who believes he can do anything

And he has done some pretty cool stuff - stuff that takes effort and skill - purely based on the fact that he knows he can if he wants to. I suspect that in his case, his parents got him to believe that he was able to achieve great things when he was a kid and it stuck.

The great bassplayer Victor Wooten is widely regarded as a 'freak-of-nature'

He began playing music professionally when he was around 6 years old! He attributes his self-belief to the fact that his older brothers told him that what he saw on cartoons when he was a little boy - like superheroes flying etc - could be achieved by him if he just believed in himself and worked hard.  

Those who believe, achieve 

All through every pursuit in life we see that the people who 'make-it' are the ones who believe that they are capable, and can achieve what they dream about.

Why then do we seem to ignore this, and instead choose to focus on our own negative self-talk? I think we like to believe we aren't that great so that if things don't work out for us we can say “I knew it! All my friends were so wrong about me! I really did suck!”

But would it be better to turn that on its head and say the same thing when you succeed instead? 'I knew it! All those discouraging people were wrong about me!'

Anyway, let me get practical for a minute.

Some tips on getting positive and believing in yourself:

1. Protect yourself from the negative people. 

They will always be there trying to pull you down to their level because they don't have the guts to try to climb up to yours.

How do you protect yourself? Choose the people you call your friends very carefully. Once you have chosen 'friends', choose the ones who encourage you the most and ONLY SHARE YOUR SPECIFIC DREAMS AND PLANS WITH THEM. Sharing your dreams with negative or jealous people will only get you a lot of free criticism and doubt.

2. Believe what people who you respect say about you. 

There are many people out there who think you are, and can be, truly great. CHOOSE to believe them. Then start to say those things to yourself.

3. Realise that every person who has done something amazing is the same as you. 

We often think that people we admire are special in some way, however reality says we are all the same - flesh and blood. What makes the ones who achieve special? They DID something they were passionate about and cared enough to complete it regardless of what people said about it.

4. Remember that there's a difference between humility and self-deprecation. 

You CAN be humble and believe in the truth that you are great at something at the same time.

This world needs more people of action. People who think they are rubbish don't usually do much for anyone. Let the truth about yourself set you free to ACT!

Take care
Andrew